If you happen to be a speed crazed motorcycle type, then there's even more reason for liking France, oh yes. In the UK you can't go more than 100 yards without coming across some device to make you go slower, the speed camera plague has gone out of all proportions! Not so in France! There are speed limits over there of course, and as a rule they are about the same as they are here, but they totally ignore them!! French rozzers also don't like enforcing them much either, which is a good thing. They do from time to time have a blitz on speeding over there, usually in the form of a radar trap. Don't worry though, drivers coming the other way will flash their lights to warn you of the oncoming danger long before you reach it! If you are a complete plonker and you do get pulled though, it's a £100 on the spot fine! You have been warned.
When you first go to France the chances are that you'll land at the port of Calais. Calais is a large-ish industrial town with a port. There's a huge sulphur factory there, and one of the first things that you'll notice is the smell. It smells like..........well it smells like shit really! But you won't want to be hanging around Calais, you'll be wanting to go south, which is a good place to want to go! Because the south of France is that bit nearer the equator, it is that bit warmer, even in the months when we are freezing our bollocks off here, the weather in the south of France is mild! Also another thing that you'll notice when coming out of the port in Calais, the passport control. The booths are there but there is very rarely anyone there to check your passport! Where are they? Probably down the local bar on the piss!
If you want to get to the south as fast as you can you'll have to use the French motorways (autoroutes), they are toll roads so be prepared, keep your credit card handy for paying at the toll booths. The speed limit is 130kph, about 83mph, but nobody sticks to that. Pick your speed and off you go! Keep an eye out for rozzers though, as I've said before if you do get nicked it's an on the spot fine.........chances are though that they'll just give you a bollocking if they pull you. Don't start to argue with them though, if you get pulled, french rozzers carry guns!
The A roads in France are called 'Route Nationals', or 'N roads',and are generally superb. If you want to take a couple of days to get to the south then this is the way to go. Take a good map with you. You'll find in every French town signs saying 'Toutes directions' (all directions) just follow these until you see the sign with the direction that you want to go, easy! If you want to stop for food, and you will want to, you'll find that most French restaurants are superb and they charge about half the price that you'd pay for an equivalent meal over here! Also at some point you'll want to find a hotel, these are dirt cheap in France. They charge per room in France not per person like over here. You can get a decent hotel room for a night for about £30, if there's two of you that's 15 quid each! It's virtually free!
France is big! Twice the size of the UK, and with the same size population as here the roads are obviously a lot more traffic free than they are here. Towns and cities are just as congested as here though. Best get to where you want to go and then go out and play on your bike. There are loads of great roads in France, too many to list here, so I'll just give you two of my favourites. The N106 from Mende to Ales, or Ales to Mende! You'll find this road about 40 miles north of Nimes. Which ever direction you ride this road it is superb. 70 odd miles of absolutely brain-out bend swinging nadgery, that will leave your brain scrambled!
Now the next road is not perhaps everyone's cup of tea, I know my mate Simon doesn't like it much, but I think everyone should ride it at least once in their lives. It is the 'Paripherique', the inner motorway around central Paris. It is 4 and sometimes 5 lanes of French lunatic drivers all trying to get to where they want to be. The rules? There aren't any! Just pick a spot and go for it! You'll need 360 degree vision and use every bit of riding skill that you have. If you're a despatch rider you'll love it! The speed limit on the Paripherique is only 50mph, but French drivers if they can will go up to a ton or more! Cars will overtake you, undertake, pull out in front of you without indicating, accidents are frequent, ignore them and press on, everyone else does! Weave in and out of the traffic and use every bit of road that you can find, it's great fun! If you can survive the Paripherique you can survive anything!
So, France is a great place for biking, it's got the roads, the food, the wine and cheap hotels, also the people love bikes in France. So what are you waiting for? Go there, go there soon!